Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
