i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
