Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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