i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
She's the barista slut.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
All I want is dick and wine.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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