we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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