Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
