My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
