normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
A+ Viking dick
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
