Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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