I'm going to jail i love you
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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