my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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