i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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