hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
