The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
