Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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