8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
