Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Im just a social blackout drinker.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
