She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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