Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Randomize
