I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
