...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
...so i touched it.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
