im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
