found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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