I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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