sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Randomize
