I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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