She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
