YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
The air was thick with penises
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
