i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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