Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
