I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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