Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
