sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
