I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize