Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
