Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
