i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
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