your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
