he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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