does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
My vagina just clenched in fear
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
