belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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