go do what you do best...puke behind churches
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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