Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
