He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
