I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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