I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
