i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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