Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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