im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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