He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize
