Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Randomize
